Blogging With Mommy

Posts Tagged ‘Family’

Yesterday was the first day of school in Michigan. I spent part of both the day and night getting kids off to school, filling out forms, and attending orientations. As I sat in my son’s preschool orientation, I was reminded of the volunteer requirements associated with the program and my heart stopped.

On multiple occasions throughout the year a parent – aka Mom – must bring in snacks and stay for the duration of the preschool session to assist the teacher in activities and help control the inevitable chaos that is created by twenty four year olds. The “snack and stay” requirement makes my stomach flip and not in a good way. I immediately felt stressed as my mind wondered about fulfilling this obligation and also adhering to the constraints of my job. Then it hit me – I quit my job and started my own consulting firm. I am my own boss and I can set my own hours. As long as I meet the deadlines and expectations of my clients I’m good to go.

I pondered this for a minute, because at this point, I realize the irony in it all. My former employer was actually led by a man who put everything above family. He was a man who would schedule business trips around tennis matches and dance recitals. Of all people, he would understand. I did not. The internal need to exceed at every single task put a great deal of stress upon my OCD self. The need to please my company and be available at any time, was probably more me than them. Nonetheless, I had constant stress from trying to please everyone and do so all the time.

Today I feel I have reached the coveted Yin and Yang of motherhood. I can truly have a professional career that I love and I can participate in my children’s activities as much as is needed. I feel balance and I didn’t realize this until my mini panic attach at orientation.

I find myself not only balanced, I am thankful.

I believe in taking care of your own. I believe in small towns and those who derive income from the vacationers who come to spend quit weekends or lazy summer vacations. They are picturesque American and the heart and sole of our country. They are our roots and a constant reminder of the world before iPhones, wi-fi, and Tivo.

My mother-in-law has a cabin up in Hale, Michigan. This tiny little town is in the middle of nowhere and it completely small town USA. Flags line the one and only street in town, people are friendly, and life is simple. There isn’t even a McDonalds. The grocery store – there are only two – closes early and you have to watch the clock so that you can pick up supplies for dinner before the workers go home. You also have to stand in line at seven am for fresh black and white doughnuts that melt in your mouth. I love all of this and I love Hale.

A few years ago a grandmother I know was speaking of Uncle Kracker buying a cottage on Long Lake. She said “the lake isn’t going to be the same now that cousin whoever bought a place”. She proceed to rant slightly about The Bachelor TV crew filming on the lake when bachelor Bob was popular and that the music crowd was going to party it up and remove the small town feel.

While I love Carrie and suspected she may be right, she was actually wrong. Cousin somebody was really Uncle Kracker. His love for Hale and the residents of this tiny town is evident in his video. He takes the best of Hale and proudly displays it to the world. His love and admiration for the people of this small town is apparent. While I liked this song before, I fell in love with it once I saw the video and the images of the city of Hale that I hold dear.

For us Hale is a magical place. It is quit and calm. It includes the cabin that was built by my in-laws many years ago when the children were small, space limited, and laughter filled the air. It includes lines on the wall that mark my daughter’s growth spurts, as well as water shoes that my children wore when they we just babies. It is family. I am so happy that Uncle Kracker sees this family and uses his media power to show it to the world.

It just makes me Smile.

Spending the day or weekend engulfed in Christmas decorations is a favorite event for my daughter Ally and me.  We fill our house with decorations and relive past holidays.  It is our day, give or take a boy or two.  It is the one day that we do not argue and that we are one.  For this reason I will always cherish the process for pulling out, hanging, and arranging our family’s Christmas decorations.

My Christmas Decorations

• I believe in putting up the Christmas tree on Thanksgiving weekend and filling the tree with as many Christmas ornaments as it can hold.
• I believe in small white lights and lots of silver ribbon.
• I believe you can have artificial trees, but you must fill your house with pine scented candles.
• I believe in an angel at the top of the Christmas tree and ornaments that are thirty years old hanging along the side.
• I believe that ever Christmas tree should have at least a dozen birds hidden for children to find.
• I believe in wrapping a few Christmas presents early, so the Christmas tree doesn’t look or feel lonely.
• I believe there is nothing as pretty as a Christmas tree at night, sparkling in the dark, as children lay in front gazing in amazement.
• I believe Christmas decorations should be both beautiful and sentimental.
• I believe my Snow Village Christmas set is as pretty as it could be and that each broken piece holds a memory.
• I believe Christmas brings out the best in us
• I believe in Santa Claus.

I was raised by my grandparents who were 100% Danes. My Christmas holidays were filled with longstanding Danish traditions, although I did not realize this until I was well into my thirties. It was then that I learned that my Christmas traditions were not the American Christmas traditions thought I believed they were for so many years. And honestly, I didn’t care.

My family Christmas was based on Danish traditions that were carried on by my grandparents. They formulated my beliefs in the holidays and cultivated my love for Christmas and everything it represents.

My husband, being the wonderful man he is, continues the one of the most important Christmas traditions for me.  Each year he hunts around Michigan for Royal Copenhagen’s annual and limited edition Christmas plate.  This task is not easily accomplished and takes much work and planning, which I might add, he does not like or do well.  But for this task, he does do it, as he knows it holds a great deal of importance to me.  This plate will hang in my dining room and will join my growing collection.  It is a reminder of my past, of my Grandmother, and of the home she welcomed me into some twenty-five years ago.  While my matriarch and lifelong hero is no longer with me, she will remain in my heart forever.  The Christmas plates returns a little bit of her to me each Christmas Eve as I open the gift.

My Christmas Traditions

• I believe in opening presents Christmas Eve night, although my husband forces Christmas day.
• I believe in performing in the annual Christmas show prior to opening gifts, although my children think this is crazy. The Christmas show was the best part of my childhood.
• I believe the door is always open for Christmas dinner and that anyone in attendance should receive gifts. A gift can be a pair of socks or an iPod, but there must be a gift.
• I believe Santa Claus can shop in her pajamas at ten o’clock at night and I am thankful to the Internet for making this possible.
• I believe in Santa Claus and stockings hung on the fireplace. I believe overnight guests must also have Christmas stockings waiting.
• I believe in reading the Christmas story, even if this is a children’s book that is at the level of a three year old.
• I believe Christmas should be an all day event spent with those you love.
• I believe the wrapping of a gift is as important as the gift itself and that wrapping is best done with a glass of wine.
• I believe a Christmas requires snow and I continue to live in Michigan so that I will receive my wish each year.
• I believe in watching Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer and The Year Without Santa four hundred times.
• I believe in bringing family together, and that if you can help you should, even if this means gifting your coveted frequent flyer miles do so.